My Dad Destroys Your Dad!

Seriously! My Dad has like 3000 reasons why. I will give you a few, right off the bat – let’s go:


1.) My dad always wears a tank top with spaghetti straps (he has tattoos, too.)

2.) My dad fucks my mom (and I think she blows him too.)

3.) My dad can lift a 45 lb barbell out at his side and hold it FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES!

4.) Sometimes my dad is four guys standing next to each other.

5.) My dad is multicultural and original.

6.) No matter how cool your dad is, mine is Bruce Springsteen.

7.) My dad is a duality of humanity – good AND evil.

8.) My dad ate a steak that was being saved for the Minnesota Vikings’ O-Line.

See what I mean? My dad OWNS! Go ahead, take a shot – tell me one good reason why your Dad would even live around my dad.


9.) My dad is still alive.

Okay, now tell me a reason.


5 Responses

  1. Are muscle dads better than fat dads?


  2. No, Less Sweat.

  3. Fat Dads pay our salaries, though…

    Well… not anymore.


  4. Is it because the fat dads passed on?

    I hope everyone’s okay.


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